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What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
It gets toad away.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Of course! The Empire State Building can't jump.
If you ever get cold, stand in the corner of a room for a while.
They're usually 90 degrees.
What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.
If you have 10 apples in one hand and 14 oranges in the other, what do you have?
Really, really big hands.
What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account?
I took part in the suntanning Olympics...
...but I only got bronze.
I told my friend not to get too excited about turning 32, since her birthday party would be so short.
"Why would it be short?" she asked.
I said, "Because it's your thirty-second birthday."